Noughty But Nice

For those that love/d the noughties, being noughty, Miss Noughty and every other pun on the similarity between the word naughty and noughty, make the most of it!

In 9hrs the 00's will be behind us and the 10's will be here .......... whoa does that sound weird ...... "Tens". Perhaps someone smarter than I will come up with an alternative cos its not like anyone calls now the "Zeros". Any ideas? How about the "won-owes", the "Lows" (like l0) or maybe the nothings..... it could just be the decade after the noughties and before the twenties!

Hope you all have appropriate gatherings planned - bbq's, parties, concerts and such. Alternatively if your in England you will be planning alot of sensible and fun INdoor activities like Guess Who, charades or Centurion cos last I checked its gunna be 0 degrees tonight and that's just in London. Try -6 in Birmingham on for size! They don't make beer coats THAT thick.

As for us, we'll be heading out for an early dinner, then gatecrashing a party in Greenwood around 9. Kylie has already set the bar low, saying she'll be in bed by 11 but we'll see how it goes.

Last ball drop day, I wrote about it being the last NYE I was single and how it felt a little weird. So does it feel different this year? I think so, although this time around I can say it'll be the last year we don't have a rugrat in tow! Who knows, maybe next year I'll be saying it's the last year I've have just one.

Anyhow, have a great New Year all from myself and the big fella @ squidring.com.
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One For The Bargain Bin

A nice easy read for your 3 day gap! The wife and I were out shopping on Saturday and I thought I'd take the opportunity to take back some clothes that I bought myself and refused to try on until I got home!

As it had been over a month, we could only get store credit so we were roaming the aisles trying to find stuff we wanted. While we were checking out the cooking books I happen to see this beauty.

The Barack & Michelle Obama Paper Doll & Cut-Out Book

After reading the title, my estimate on the quality of the content wasn't high, I mean - whaaaaa???? It was one of those times where WTF didn't cut it. Inside are thin cardboard pages with partially cut 'snap-out' images on them. Starting with Barack and Michelle on the first page you move through the book, gradually obtaining a very wide variety of clothes ranging from the standard formal wear to casual, fire-fighting and even swimwear. Of course the clothes themselves are also made out of thin cardboard so the action of putting clothes ON them is more of a holding it UP AGAINST them kinda thing.

What's possibly the most puzzling is that the book is on sale in a country where the majority of the population couldn't even pick Obama out of a line-up............ and No I'm not saying that's such a bad thing, I probably couldn't either!

Where's the K-Rudd & Therese Rein Paper Doll & Cut-Out book?

Clearly all of the above is my personal opinion so perhaps I'm totally off the mark here, maybe there are alot of Australians that want to simulate dressing the B man or see the president in his underwear or maybe you've always wanted to know what the Obama's would be like in the Miss America pageant...... not sure what their talent would be tho.... kindling comes to mind!

P.S. I've just realised I've written a few 'buzz' words in this article so for all those FBI agents reading this, just because I've written Barack, Obama, fire, president, America, WTF, line-up, credit, cut and kindling it doesn't mean I want to set fire to the president or own a fertilizer plant ........... ah shit there's another one!


Soundtrack Of The Day: 3 Doors Down - Seventeen Days
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Weekly WTF: Bark4Beer

Merry Christmas From Squidring!!!!!

Conchords Grounded

After 2 seasons and a huge amount of hype about the 3rd, Flight Of The Conchords is officially no more.

The announcement was made on their website earlier this month when they had this to say:

"We've noticed the less we say about the future of the show, the more people want to talk about it, so in an effort to reverse this trend we are today announcing that we won’t be returning for a 3rd season. We're very proud of the two seasons we made and we like the way the show ended. We'd like to thank everyone who helped make the show and also everyone who watched it. While the characters Bret and Jemaine will no longer be around, the real Bret and Jemaine will continue to exist."

Personally I thought the first season was ripsnortingly hilarious but it did seem to tone down in the second. It was like they were riding the fame wave and it carried them beautifully through to the season finale. I suppose they had their whole lives to write the songs for the first season and only 6 months to write the tunes for the second - understandable!

Of the 22 episodes made, my favourites would have to be:
S1E7 Drive By - A local street grocer racially discriminates the guys because he thinks they are Australian. They learn how to deal a good comeback and flip 'the bird'.
S1E10 New Fans - Because there are only 2 members in the FOTC Fan Club, Murray decides they should take turns holding a beer to look cool. They recruit 2 new members only to discover that one wants a threesome with both of them while on acid.
S2E2 New Cup - Bret decides to splurge on a new $1.70 cup starting a chain reaction which leaves the guys performing live without instruments.
S2E5 Unnatural Love - Jemaine has a few too many and wakes up with an Australian sheila named Keitha cos her dad liked the name Keith. He falls for her only to realise that Bret and her Australian friends will do anything to stop them seeing each other.

I'm definitely sorry to see the show end but with these guys, hopefully its just the beginning! If you're a fan I recommend you catch some of their pre-FOTC live standup acts on YouTube.com, its well worth it.
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Hottest 100 Voting Time

Whats your top 10 songs of two double "OH!" nine? Heres my votes:

10 - Bertie Blackman - Heart
- Underrated, underknown, could have picked a number of songs from her but this one stands out for me
9 - Muse - Undisclosed Desires
- Big fan, the new album is treading some scary water for my fandom but this song is great, might have been even better if it was a new band
8 - Death Cab For Cutie - Little Bribes
- Released late in the year, another catchy tune from a ridiculously underrated artist. Boy can Ben Gibbard pen a tune.
7 - Pearl Jam - Force of Nature
- its me, I couldn't not put a PJ song here if they release an album in the year, simply my favourite off the album.
6 - Julian Casablancas - 11th Dimension
- I'm not a strokes fan, this sounds nothing like them, its almost dancey, its bloody awesome.
5 - Dappled Cities - The Price
- I doubt I could tell you another song by these guys despite them being round for eons, this one just clicks with me.
4 - Powderfinger - Burn Your Name
- Latest single off a brilliant return to form album from Australia's best band, might have chosen a different album track (wildest stretch)
but this might actually make it in despite not being on the list!
3 - Karnivool - All I Know
- great album, its more "commercial" then some other tracks but I think its a stand out and the clip is outstanding
2 - Paul Dempsey - Ramona Was A Waitress
- I've been known to like Something for Kate songs, I don't own any of their albums, but this song is the type of
singer/songwriter song that I wish I wrote.
1 - The Butterfly Effect - Worlds on Fire
- An epic, great album opener, vast variety of instrumentation and timing changes, builds, falls and by the end when it peaks and then
finishes just leaves you hitting the 'back' button for another round.
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TAF 10

Just wanted to put up a posting regarding TAF10 (Tight-Arse Festival 2010) as its been awhile and I don't want you to think it's been canned! Penciled items have become penned, good ideas have become gospel, plans and itineraries are in place and to say its all systems go is an enormous understatement.

Background: Because BDO is a twat infested, hairy mole on the music industries buttocks we have decided to have our own festival. Rather then spend a fortune on tickets, beer and food surrounded by the thousands of filthy, stinking, sweaty, dehydrated, drug filled toss-pots at the BDO - come and relax, crack a beer and pitch a tent with us at TAF10.

It will be held on the same weekend as the BDO - 30th/31st January - in our backyard.

So How Will It Work?:

Musically, we will be copying BDO but they are still finalising their lineup. Confirmed acts this year are Eskimo Joe, Powderfinger, Muse, Lily Allen, Karnivool and Hilltop Hoods just to name a few.

Once the final lineup is confirmed I will order them by popularity and buy the latest CD from each artist based on the TAF RSVP'd attendance. Eg: If 15 people RSVP to TAF, I'll buy the CD of the 15 most popular artists performing. The TAF entry fee is $25 per person and this will BUY you one of those CD's, chosen at random, which you take home afterward.

In accordance with the REAL music festival guidelines, camping facilities are available and highly recommended to ensure you're well and truly, amongst the action. There are 2 camping areas in our backyard: Crystal Lake (North) and Candy Mountain (South) - both offer powered sites and have Toilet/Shower facilities available.

Click Here For An Official Festival Map

TAF is proudly affiliated with Ah Yeah Brewing Co. who has kindly offered to setup a self service on-site bar with tap beers for the festival. Full range of beers and prices (crazy cheap) will be released closer to the date but chances are, if your a beer drinker, your covered!

All food, other beverages, tents and eskies etc are BYO. TAF will have free on-site cooking facilities available (2 BBQ's + Weber), hot water and toilet paper will be ample and provided. All crazy cooking techniques encouraged, volunteers needed for the mammoth Sunday morning fry-up.

So RSVP-ASAP to come along to TAF and join us kicking back, sipping a cold beer in the backyard and making music history! Who knows, it could just be the start....


Phil Dawson
TAF Chairperson
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Weekly WTF: Guitar Toilet Seat

Lets Go Surfin' Now

The bullet has been bitten and for the second time in my life, I've bought a surfboard.

Once again I've slipped under the illusion that I will learn to surf so hopefully I will use this one a little more than my last. The last one was purchased after selling my beloved radio controlled car which I used every second day, and sat perched in my room for 2-3 years before selling it cos I only used it about once a year. DOH!

Whats even more concerning is that I was about 65kgs at the time, full of energy, at school, lived at home with no responsibilities and i STILL didn't use it. Now I'm 95kgs, have no energy whatsoever and am 50% of a full time working household. Oh yes its all against me - but I'm hoping THAT will give me the drive to get off my fat arse and actually use Perth's best feature to the fullest.

Its the can'ts that mean I CAN!

Dawn Patrol tomorrow morning will be its first outing so I'm crossing my fingers that it will keep me afloat! Yet another incentive to shed those unwanted layers of insulation.
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Bowl'd Shane

Today I'm writing this from my desk as usual but what's a little UNusual is that I'm in a bright yellow, Aussie cricket shirt!

I started a little early to get a few tasks outa the way but at 10 I'm off like David Hasselh___! You see, the one (and only one) advantage in my new work premises is that its about 5 mins walk to the WACA. Play is starting at 10.30 so I can work here for 3 hours and still casually stroll to get there way before time. Booyar

Today is day 3 of the third test match between the Windies and the Stray-yans. If you haven't been keeping track, here is a quick rundown of the game so far: Aussies batted first, Windies hit Ponting with the ball and sent him off hurt - Declared @ 520. Windies are now 2/214 off only 276 balls.

What that means is, the Windies are dominating so far but it all hinges on today.

There were a few interesting altercations at the crease however, alot of chest puffing, big talking and threats which has only resulted in a possible penalty fine for the players involved. Minor? Yes but for cricket that's extreme!

Hopefully today the local lads neck up and get some wickets so it's on like DK biatches!

Soundtrack Of The Day: Shihad - The General Electric
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New Moke?

BMW have released a concept car, thought to be the new Moke. Unlike other concept cars, this one actually looks like it could be produced in some fashion without costing 100's of thousands, however to be classed as 'the new Moke' is an enormous call.

Lets start with the similarities:
Does it make any logical sense to manufacture it?: No - TICK
Number of Doors: 0 - TICK
Is it fun to drive?: Probably - TICK

Now the differences:
Is it safe: Yes - FAIL
Mechanical - A/C? Heating? Radio? Gauges? Working Seatbelts? - Yes - FAIL
Physical - Chassis? Roof? Sides? Back?: Yes - EPIC FAIL
Does it work offroad? - No - FAIL. The old Moke would literally go everywhere, this one will only go from Daddy's lock up garage to a bitumen carpark near some grass.
And lets be honest, the thing looks absolutely f$%king stupid - FAIL

Check out the link for a few more pics so you can see what I mean.

The questions I have are, Why does the spare tyre have a vent? Why was the car so obviously superimposed on the hard limestone track, 2m off the road? Why are you making 'Mini' cars so big? Why did you hire Starship Troopers and decide "Hey those cars could be cool!"?

My official statement to BMW - "Now that people blame everyone/everything else for their stupidity in life, the Moke dream is over. Buy an old one, jam a stick on the accelerator and surf the freeway 'Teenwolf' style. You will realise the world doesn't need another one!"

P.S. Love the comment someone wrote on the ad!
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The Offspring

No not the band.........the -4.5 month old currently at work with Kylie.

We had our 20-21 week scan this morning and all is well with Dawson Jnr . We were told that its a good time to measure head, stomach, legs, arms, toes, bladder, nose hairs and reaction to Barbara Streisand however all of these were made severely difficult by its bloody hyperactivity!

Kylie had a decaf coffee at around 8am and the scan was at 8.30 so the tiny amount of 'giddy-up' in there must have been like catnip cos the little tyke was bouncing around like Tigger in there. Like chasing a bar of soap around an empty bath, the radiologist was poking, rubbing and twisting away to try and get the shots she needed.

She eventually gave up trying to get the spinal images and Kylie had to go for a walk to try and settle everything down. After a few minutes and a well earned pee(!), DJ came off his/her 30min bender and we finished up.

Got the usual take home happy-snaps to goo-goo and ga-ga over but all in all everything is where it should be which is fab. The gut and head diameters are a larger than usual so DJ's taking after his father already. Eeeeeeep!

Peas out

Soundtrack Of The Day: P_ _ _ _ _ o_ M _ _ _
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Weekly WTF: Navel Inspired Jewelery

What a Scorcher!

Well finally the hot weather is upon us and holy mother of the highest heavens, is it hot!

One day of 38 is bearable but 3 on the trot is major mojito's. A/C units all over Perth have been whirring away for days and I'm sure the next block of newspaper propaganda about electricity usage is a mere keystroke away.

On a terrific note, it's meant that the water temperature is beautiful and I've been beaching alot more which is always brilliant. I've been able to take advantage of the small but shapely summer waves recently so my surfing skills have improved slightly if I do say so myself.

I've been thinking strongly about picking up a surfboard of my very own and on Sunday karma bit me in the coit. I've been selfishly borrowing my brothers board cos lets be honest, they're pretty expensive and don't get used all that much - went out in the water with 3 fins and came back with 2 - DOH! Absolutely no idea how it happened either, at least if there was an incident I would know what to avoid later! Lucky they appear to be snap ons so it wont be a total headf$#k to replace and its the centre one so the board's still more-or-less usable until it arrives. Such is life I suppose!

Hope you're all looking forward to christmas and your shopping is already done so you can relax............ yeah right!


Soundtrack Of The Day: Mindless office chatter cos I forgot my headphones.
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Cryptic Music Quiz : the Return

1. Go inside the place boys take fake meds - Phil - Placebo
2. Cartman has been know to clap tonnes - Phil - Eric Clapton
3. Resting on the knees is for those not so old - Phil - Neil Young
4. NW USA is the home of maple jar jumble sales - Anne - Pearl Jam
5. An evil spirit can heard in Cuba's region (7) - Incubus
6. Would you tonk pils beer back? - Phil - Slipknot
7. Worldwide bobbys are found inside winter pollen - Phil - Interpol
8. This theatre show is rather chilly - Noni - Coldplay
9. Retired police man still has venomous impact - Phil - Sting
10. The Ripper's boy has a handful - Phil - Jackson 5
11. Noel is back and has monarchs a plenty - Anne - Kings of Leon
12. Athletic wear is never last to be found inside - Anne - Everlast
13. 80's mispelling certainly sticks in your mind - Noni - Styx
14. Bonnets found at the peak of small mountains - Noni - Hilltop Hoods
15. A wonderful initial reaction to tiny little creatures - Anne - TLC
16. Self abuse sounds like devine ills - Phil - Divinyls
17. A common man's servant? I'll take three! (4,6,4) - Phil - John Butler Trio
18. A punk? I would swap with you - Phil - Pink
19. Not here, try the third entrance below - Anne - Three Doors Down
20. NZ boys? you should hear what she had to say about them (6) - Phil - Shihad
21. As a whole its a flawless shape - Anne - A Perfect Circle
22. The Clampetts struck gold at witching hour - Anne - Midnight Oil
23. Hungry Lycans listen as the dew ran again and again (5,5) - Phil - Duran Duran
24. Crazy jihad bee was founder of Bart's town - Anne - Jebediah
25. Talking cartoon dog would join Mortisha's family - Phil - Bryan Adams
26. Get this flue sorted! you need a power source! - Capt Funny Pants - Fuel
27. Hear this, share the infamous battlship scene (4) - Cher
28. After 14570 days how old will you be? (4) - Phil - UB40
29. Mispelled creatures of the mist - Anne - Gorillaz
30. The irish? they are very cosmopolitan with vodka - Anne - The Cranberries
31. Mickey doesn't talk himself up - Phil - Modest Mouse
32. This yard job is a mess, hurts my bones! - Phil - Bodyjar
33. The red one is better known in France (2,4) - Anne - La Roux
34. Watch out these days for the messy frog diner, pew! - Phil - Powderfinger
35. Pitching a tent? only with honeydew and a toilet (4, 10) - Phil - John Mellencamp
36. Half a repeat of the red wiggle - Phil - Pete Murray
37. Prisoner of the music? say adios value! - Phil - Audioslave
38. The first one man car, how bizarre - Phil - OMC
39. The flowers preferred the frozen palace - Phil - Icehouse
40. Nice jewelery, so long as they bang less - Anne - The Bangles

Good Luck!

Soundtrack Of The Day: Karnivool

EDIT : Clues added - 14/12
EDIT : Only 4 Left! - 15/12
EDIT : TWO left! - 17/12
EDIT : FINAL ANSWERS GIVEN! Thanks for playing!

New Tunes

I have put two new songs on my music site if anyone is interested to have a listen, I have been experimenting with a new music software program so feel free to critique!

www.soundclick.com/solat

am working thru another couple of songs so hopefully get them done over the Christmas break

Soundtrack Of The Day: Golden Rule - Powderfinger : they're back and I'm loving it

Weekly WTF: Stuffed Animals With Vaginas

Album Quiz 2

I've decided to release these once a month until I get bored. BEHOLD

http://picasaweb.google.com/philgdawson/AlbumQuiz2#

There are 50 albums so write your guesses in the comment field on each pic and as I see the correct answers I'll flag the album as done. As with the last quiz, please verify your response is secure by clicking back and forward after you enter one. I've tried to make some simple, some odd, some brain twisters, some alternative and some so mainstream-commercial its scary.

Hints:
1. None of the albums are Best Of's, Greatest Hits, Live, Compilations or anything other than an official release.
2. The same artist may feature more than once.
3. You can use the net as much as you want so everyone has the same UNfair advantage!

I think this one is a little harder than the last but as it showed, its not the hardest that remain unsolved.....

Enjoy!

UPDATE
13.15: Wal and Smads have had a crack .... Anne takes to the floor! - 16 down : 34 to go. The guys here in the office got 9 more within 5 mins...... cmon, LIFT!
15.30: The wall has hit early. Radio silence until Smads gets home and tells Bel there's another Quiz! Get your answers in while you can....

7/12 8.30: Kathy takes a print out to a gathering of her entourage and picks up 13 over the weekend. I've got inside knowledge that a few sneaky google searches revealed a couple of answers so don't give up just cos you don't have the album! (eg: #40 has a circle thing so google 'album cover circle'. Creed appears as the third link.......lucky the album's called Full Circle i spose!) 22 to go.
9.30: Kathy picks 3 more as she noses to the finish.... absolutely dominating Quiz 2
13:00: ....and Ditto on 2 more. 17 remain!
15:30: All quiet on the frontline - Clues will go up at 12 tomorrow.

8/12 16:00: CLUES ADDED!

9/12 10:30: Wal has overnight success and Adam sweeps the 4 - 9 to go!!!
11:45: Adam takes 2 more - 7 remain.

10/12: 9:00: Adam takes one. Second clue added - now its bloody obvious!
14:45: Adam's taken it down to all but...... Who can close?
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Swipe This!

Ok, Wow.

Even if you aren't an iPhone user, fan, liker or if this is the first time you've ever heard of one - 'The Square' is impressive. Anyone with an iPhone and a relevant merchant account can accept credit card payments on the fly, OTA, wherever, whenever.

I'm not sure if the prices have been released yet but the opportunities and prospects on this are extreme. Imagine being able to accept secure payments wherever you have your iPhone. Offering the reassurance of an emailed or SMS'd receipt, signing functionalities, even a photo of the card holder on screen for the vendors assurance that the card holder is the owner.

Just think....
- Cafe strip customers? Swipe
- Sunset Strip customers? Swipe
- Strip joint customers that pull out their CC and "Where should I swipe this?" - Here dickhead! Swipe
- Bought tickets to a concert and all your mates said they would pay you back but haven't? Swipe
- Meet someone at a different or remote Tennis Court for a lesson and they want to pay for 20 more then and there? Swipe
- Helens Homemade Honey stall not able to take card at the local fete? Swipe
- Selling beer from the back of your ute to underage school kids at 3.15pm? Swipe
- Selling the rest to the teachers at 4? Swipe
- Users not coughing up the green for their ounce of crack? Send the boys round with The Square!

Also as the iPhone contains a GPS, a future upgrade could be a purchase tracker. Imagine heading out for a night on the town and tracing your movements the next day on the net to find out exactly where you went and how much time was inbetween. Actually maybe some things are better off forgotten!

Mmmm, future stuff.

Soundtrack Of The Day: Def Leppard - Vault
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Miniature Nova

So after years of 'faithful' dependence on the good developers at mininova, the long arm of the law has struck and struck hard. The threat of court action on torrent hosting sites are causing them to drop like tin cans on farm fence.

We saw it earlier in the year with TPB but as they always do, they bounced back and are bigger and badder than ever. Torrents are flying off the pages faster with every court case - infamy at its best.

Mininova was not so lucky. Without going into details (mainly because I don't understand them!) they have been culled to a copyright free file sharing site only even though they never actually hosted any illegal material. These days even a minor contribution to the distribution of copyrighted material is squashed in million dollar lawsuits and drowned in reams of paperwork that would make Reflex shareholders grin from ear to ear.

However, as the saying goes, there IS light at the end of this tunnel. Teenage dipshits all around the globe will find it harder to get their mitts on the latest Twilight movie and possibly grow a couple more brain cells before they're dissolved in onscreen dribble. Perhaps a better title would have been 'Woman No!'. I did have to chuckle when I read a review of it today:

"I felt like gouging my eyes out with scorpions, and that was only after the first ten minutes."
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Weekly WTF: Kinda Car

Scrub Up

I was trawling through my 'MyEpisodes' account yesterday cos shows are becoming significantly thinner as we near Christmas. To my surprise I saw Scrubs listed.... which officially ended (and I blogged about!) back in May.... What the?

Turns out the producers have had the show return planned for some time and the Ninth season will transition the show from the JD narrated format it was, to more of a regular sitcom setup. JD (Zach Braff) and Elliot (Sarah Chalke) have locked in for 6 episodes as the metamorphosis is made while Turk (Donald Faison) and Dr Cox (John C. McGinley) have closed deals to continue as regulars as long as they don't interfere with their current projects.

Newer characters are set to take the lead such as Lucy (Eliza Coupe, pictured) who was introduced in season 8 and 3 or 4 brand new interns will be built up right from the get go. The story will deviate to more of a medical learning scenario and old cast members will likely cameo as teachers rather than appear as constant regulars.

My opinion so far is, let it go and make a new spin off rather than draining the Scrubs name. However I'll be very happy if I'm wrong cos Scrubs was one of those shows I really enjoyed watching. Simple, light hearted fun.

Season 9 starts today so stay tuned for the review!

P.S. If you didn't know, Top Gear S14 has started so get on it - car bonnet.
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